Onion news today
The Onion, a satirical news organization, publishes humorous and ironic articles on a daily basis. Here are some of the top stories from today:
Headlines:
- "Nation Horrified By Graphic Video Of Politician Keeping Campaign Promise"
- "Area Man Still Unable To Find Meaning In Life Despite Having 3.5 Million Followers On Social Media"
- "New Study Reveals Most People Would Rather Eat A Whole Jar Of Wasabi Than Attend A Family Reunion"
- "Local Man's 'I'm Not A Morning Person' Excuse Falls Flat After 12th Cup Of Coffee"
- "Area Woman's 'I'm Not A Morning Person' Excuse Falls Flat After 3rd Alarm Clock"
Articles:
- "Nation Horrified By Graphic Video Of Politician Keeping Campaign Promise" - A shocking video has surfaced showing a politician actually following through on a campaign promise, leaving many Americans in a state of utter disbelief.
- "Area Man Still Unable To Find Meaning In Life Despite Having 3.5 Million Followers On Social Media" - Despite having a massive online following, a local man has confessed to still feeling empty and unfulfilled, leaving experts baffled.
- "New Study Reveals Most People Would Rather Eat A Whole Jar Of Wasabi Than Attend A Family Reunion" - A recent study has found that a staggering 9 out of 10 people would rather endure the fiery wrath of wasabi than sit through a family reunion.
- "Local Man's 'I'm Not A Morning Person' Excuse Falls Flat After 12th Cup Of Coffee" - A man's attempt to use his "I'm not a morning person" excuse to get out of work was foiled when he was seen downing his 12th cup of coffee of the day.
- "Area Woman's 'I'm Not A Morning Person' Excuse Falls Flat After 3rd Alarm Clock" - A woman's claim that she's not a morning person was met with skepticism after she was seen hitting the snooze button for the third time.
These are just a few of the many hilarious and satirical articles published by The Onion today.