I have peace now that my son is dead he wanted to kill me 42 year old woman

I'm so sorry to hear that you're going through this. Losing a child is one of the most devastating experiences a parent can face, and it's even more complicated when there's a history of conflict and violence.

It's understandable that you're feeling a mix of emotions, including relief that the threat of violence is no longer present. However, it's also important to acknowledge the grief and pain you're experiencing as a result of your son's passing.

It's important to remember that you didn't deserve to be threatened or harmed by your son, and it's not your fault that he was struggling with these issues. It's important to be kind to yourself and seek support from loved ones, mental health professionals, or support groups.

If you're feeling overwhelmed or struggling to cope with your emotions, consider reaching out to a crisis helpline or text line, such as the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-TALK) or the Crisis Text Line (text "HOME" to 741741). These resources are available 24/7 and can provide you with immediate support and guidance.

Remember, you are not alone, and there are people who care about you and want to help.